Advice For Those Who Really Want to Go to Hell

1. Don't go to church - Those church people all obviously need a crutch, and going to church helps them have that. They need to be around other people who want to learn more about God, and they like spending time together.  If you really want to go to Hell, you don't need that in your life. Besides, lots of people who go to church end up believing on Jesus and trusting in the Lord, and that would totally mess things up for you.

2. Don't read your Bible - This a major danger for you who are wanting to go to Hell. Too many people who set out to prove the Bible wrong, have read it over and over, and ended up believing it, and trusting Jesus Christ to be their Saviour. Be really careful about reading the Bible (specifically that King James Bible), or it might change your life... even your eternity.  You can't risk it.

3. Don't let those Christians shove their religion down your throat - Those guys are always doing crazy stuff... like praying over their meals even if you can see them, or inviting you to some special event at their church (see #1... it's a trap!), or they might even try to talk about Jesus with you (which is probably illegal... or something).  All that is a lot of pressure, and probably makes you feel strange.  If you want to go to Hell, you'll have to fight the urge to give in to that stuff.

4. Ignore that little voice - That is probably just the Holy Spirit trying to team up with Christians to mess with your mind. Even when that voice makes so much sense, and you really want to give in... you gotta fight it all the way.  You know that if you give in to that voice, you'll end up believing, and that would ruin all your plans of going to Hell, then being cast into the Lake of Fire for all eternity.

5. Throw away all Gospel tracts - Some people read those, and keep them around in a nightstand drawer to look at every once in a while. That's a really big risk, because those things have lots of Bible verses in them.  First you'll be curious, then you'll read it over and over, then that voice will start on you again, and you might end up believing.  Listen, you will never go to Hell if you trust on the Lord Jesus Christ... you've been warned.

6. Keep believing that all those Christians want is your money - Please completely ignore the fact that they have never asked you for money.  It's a trap.  Yes, they built a building for you to come visit, they printed all those Gospel tracts that they hand out for free, they give groceries to hungry families, they go out and pick kids up on church buses that burn a ton of gas, and all that is probably just a trick to get you to start giving money.  They are already paying all their bills, and giving to the poor, and supporting missions, and doing all this stuff without you... but it's probably a trick... probably.  Even though it doesn't make sense, you should keep on believing those rumors.  Keep your eyes on the handful of charlatans on television, and ignore all the thousands of small churches that just seem to be trying to reach their community for Christ.  If you ever got the idea that those local churches just loved Jesus... and you... you might end up visiting there to find out why they care about your soul.  See #1.

7. Don't think about missionaries and church planters - If you give much more than just a passing thought to the fact that many families have given up well-paying jobs with tons of security, to travel around the world to "shove their religion" down people's throats, it will cause all sorts of questions to pop up in your mind.  If you read about any of them, you would find out that they are doing what they feel like God is telling them to do. (See... that's why you have to be careful about listening to that small voice.  See #4)  These nuts leave their families, their homes, their culture, their language, and everything else they know, to go to an unfamiliar land to tell people about Jesus. Many of these missionaries might even employ tactics like feeding the hungry, providing a medical clinic, helping with disaster relief and saving lives. It's a coordinated effort with those churches you shouldn't visit, those Christians you shouldn't listen to, that voice you should ignore, that Bible you shouldn't read, and... well... you get it. Try to not to think about, because it just doesn't make sense.

8. Never research stuff for yourself - If you see a funny meme on Facebook that attacks the Bible, don't ever go back and read the whole context... or else that meme might not be funny anymore, and might end up being proven to be false. If you see statistics, believe them, because they couldn't put it on the internet if it wasn't true... probably.  If you are wanting to go to Hell, you can't allow anything to cause you to doubt any agenda that is trying to help you get there. 

9. Judge every Christian as a hypocrite - You hear it all the time, so it must be true.  Those people who seem like "goody-goodies" are probably just as bad as all the others. In the rest of life, it's okay to judge each individual on their own merits, but you don't want to do that with those Christians.  If you said that because lots of terrorists were Arabs, therefore ALL Arabs must want to rape your children, cut your head off, and blow up America, that would be seen as ridiculous, especially since there are so many Arabs that are pretending to be normal people just trying to care for their families.  If you said, because some black guy robbed a store, that all black people should be judged guilty and thrown into prison, that would be outrageous and racist.  If one of your own children made a mistake (lied, got into a fight, stole something, disobeyed you), you wouldn't punish them forever and deem all children as wicked, evil, little delinquents that could never be trusted.  That's different with Christians though, because those Christians talk about how perfect they are... I mean... you've never heard them say that they are perfect... and they deny being perfect when you ask them... but there are some that seem to have a little judgmental attitude, so it's probably okay to lump them all together as hypocrites.  If you judged each Christian on their own merits, you might realize that they are just humans who make mistakes, even though they believe in God.  That might mess up one of your greatest excuses ever, and you might end up violating #1-8 above.  If you are really serious about going to Hell... don't risk it.  Place a higher standard on anyone who has ever darkened the door of a church, and judge them all as hypocrites, just in case.

10. Ignore the Gospel - Whether it's coming from the Bible, a Gospel tract, or from the mouth of a believer, you just can't risk it.  The multiple eye-witness accounts that have been proven to be historically accurate are just dangerous for you. If you listen to that stuff, it will definitely change your life.  The fact that you (along with everyone else that has ever lived) are a sinner, and could never possibly earn your way to Heaven... the fact that the penalty for sin is death and Hell... the fact that Jesus died a substitutionary death to pay for you sins... the fact that He was buried and rose again (which was witnessed by over 500 people, and on many occasions)... the fact that God loves you that much... to send His own Son to die in your place, so you wouldn't have to go to Hell, but could have eternal life through and with Jesus Christ our Lord... must be ignored at all cost.

See, according to the Scriptures, if you were to believe the Gospel (death, burial, resurrection) and trust on the name of the Lord, you would be saved.  If you are seriously wanting to go to Hell, you have got to resist the urge to read the following verses:

Galatians  5:19-21 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.

1John  1:8  If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 

Romans  3:10   As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: 

Romans  3:23   For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; 

Ro 5:6-8   For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.  For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die.  But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. 

1Pe 3:18   For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit: 

Romans  6:23   For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. 

Romans  10:8-13  But what saith it? The word is nigh thee, even in thy mouth, and in thy heart: that is, the word of faith, which we preach; That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.
For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.  For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed.  For there is no difference between the Jew and the Greek: for the same Lord over all is rich unto all that call upon him.  For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. 

Ephesians 2:8-9   For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:  Not of works, lest any man should boast. 

Titus  3:5-7  Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost;
Which he shed on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Saviour; That being justified by his grace, we should be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life. 

1 John 5:13  These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God. 

John  10:28-29   And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.  My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father's hand. 

Obviously, I'm hoping that today's advice was useless to you, because you have trusted on the Lord Jesus Christ.  He loves us.  If you have any questions, please contact us.

brothergrice@sbcglobal.net